Jimmy and Timmy Frankie had a strange family.
First of all, their parents liked everybody in the family to have names that ended in long e’s (like Tammy, Tommy, or Jenny). Strange things seemed to happen only to them, like the time some pirates came on shore and headed straight towards their house, or when a slice of cheese suddenly became alive and did some magic to turn their dead great, great, great, great times 10 grandfather into a zombie. But this is the story of when some colonists somehow went through a time portal/machine and told them about something. Something secret. You will find out later on.
In this adventure Jimmy and Timmy will find out “random, important, earth-shattering facts,” as famous philosopher Markie Twainy (yes, he was part of the Frankie family; an ancestor) described it.
Now to the story.
Jimmy’s half of the story, in his point of view:
It all began on a normal Frankie family day. Mr.Cheeseman was busy sending zombies into our house. The pirates that he turned into oversized cats were busy chasing them away as part of The Deal. Then the furnace started making some weird noises.
It was sort of like a growl, roar, meow, and bark at the same time. So it went kind of like, “Groameoof!” It sounded a little distant.
Then a whirling sound, like what you’d hear in a warping sound in a video game, and a pop. Then another one of those “Groameoof”s. That’s when I realized it was a sneeze.
Mom called, “Jimmy, go check what’s happening to the furnace,” like it was any regular day (actually, it was).
I nodded to my twin brother, Timmy, which really meant, “Come with me” in our secret code.
So we went downstairs to check on it.
OK, now let me tell you, it was not winter, so the furnace wasn’t on. No need to tell you the exact date. So it was strange that it was making noises like it was on. Or not on. Well, strange in this house is everyday.
What we saw in front of the furnace was a memory I would never forget. Wait, maybe I would, because I don’t remember the time some terrorists attacked our house. Or was it tourists? Anyway, our parents told us about it. But they said that it happened when I was little. Or maybe I would get a souvenir or something, like those oversized cats. Or maybe—
Oops, maybe I’m getting a little off topic. Yeah, I know what you’re thinking. Hurry up and get back to the story already! Well, FYI, I need to tell you these things so you can get used to the family.
And now you’re thinking, O_o.
So now I’m thinking, >:-(. Why hadn’t you thought of that before?!
OK, enough with the emotes.
So now, what we saw was: two men dressed in an old-fashioned way, one of them sneezing (Groameoof! Groameoof!) and saying, “You know Bob, I really detest this pollen! Where are we anyway?” and the other man, Bob, said, “I don’t know, Sam.”
Timmy looked at where our flowers were on the stool a few feet away from the furnace and said, “Oops, sorry,” picked it up, and put it in the backyard. That was when they noticed us.
Suddenly one of them (Sam, I think) drew a long, thin saber out of a scabbard that we hadn’t seen before, and swung at Timmy. He looked just in time to pick up the nearest thing—a screwdriver. Then the man sneezed (that’s when I knew he was Sam, the sneezer) and misaimed so the blade clanged onto the screwdriver. The noise was loud enough to wake up dad from his usual daydreaming.
Now, if you think I have parents who do not care about me whatsoever you are WRONG. They would give their own lives to save ours. And that’s why Dad came running down the stairs with a baseball bat just in time to whack the two men on the head. Really hard.
Mom quickly ran down to see what was happening.
“Jimmy, go get some ropes,” snapped Dad, “Timmy, put away that screwdriver.”
We always had some rope just in case some thing like this happened.
So I went upstairs, looked inside the emergency toolbox. The bundle of ropes was not there as it would be usually. So I went back down and told Dad.
“Try looking in the glove compartment,” he answered, “I might have brought them to work yesterday. Here are the keys.”
Dad was a “mountain rescuer,” as he called himself. Fortunately, he did not rescue mountains, but lost mountain climbers. He always went to work with our dog, Sir Barrier (when he stood, he was like a small shaggy, smelly, metal barrier, and he was as brave as a knight) who now was, unfortunately, at the vet getting healed for a broken leg.
I did as he commanded, and found it. Then I watched Mom and Dad tie the two men up.
Suddenly, Timmy broke the silence.
“Who are they, any way?” he asked to no one in particular.
“Colonists, by the looks of it,” answered Dad.
Timmy and I looked at each other, silently asking each other the same question: How did they get here?
OK, have you caught up with the story yet? If not, here is a short summary of what has happened so far.
The strange Frankie family had some colonists in their house. They turned up mysteriously next to a noise-making furnace. The father of the family had knocked them out and tied them up.
Isn’t there anything better than that?
Anyway, now it’s Timmy’s turn to tell his half.
Timmy’s half of the story, in his point of view:
Yeah, it’s my turn. Who’s cooler, me or Jimmy?!
Anyway, when we silently asked each other that, Dad seemed to read our minds. Not by answering, but by saying a command.
“Timmy, go check the furnace,” he said.
I nodded to Jimmy, which is code for—wait, he already told you? Oh, good. Now I won’t have to explain it.
We looked all around the furnace. Not a thing that was unusual.
“Nothing, Dad,” Jimmy called.
And he gets all the glory.
Then the colonists suddenly woke up and screamed, “We are the messengers!” together, thereupon Bob took a folded scrap of paper, handed it to Mom quickly, scribbled something on the floor some kind of pen (where did he get that?), then disappeared in a flash of bright light.
Everybody was silent a moment, then Jimmy commented, “Sam left his sword.”
What a random comment.
Right then and there I decided to at least do something before Jimmy. So I read what was on the floor.
I had to twist my head and squint a little, but I managed out, “Turn the heating contraption off forever.”
See, this is one of those “random, important, earth-shattering facts.” They have nothing to do with the story.
Oh well, on with the story, once again.
Then Mom read out the paper: “If you don’t, the universe will start to collapse on itself (as it is already doing so right now; we can only stall Time) and Dark Matter will become a rogue against the laws of physics, defying gravity and pulling the universe apart, marking the end of life as we see it right now.”
“How do they know about dark matter before it was discovered?” I pondered aloud.
Dad shrugged. So did everyone else.
We did as they told us to and bought portable heaters instead, to be saved for winter.
Marking the end of this story as we see it right now.
Yes, I know you’re thinking, That wasn’t exactly half of the story, blah blah blah. Who cares? At least you know what will happen when the universe ends.
Oh yeah, I also forgot to add the part when they realized that the furnace was an ATTLP (Automatic Time-traveling Landing Port). If they didn’t stop it, the next time they used it it would malfunction and cause the universe to go into chaos. So the Frankie family, once again, were the heroes of the day, or rather the universe.